Dancing With Myself

[Julie Lei]

Julie sat cross legged in the middle of a white room, her only covering was her long black hair that extended far beyond her waist, if one wasn't looking closely they would think she was simply wearing a brief swimsuit, but her hair was simply covering her. Her eyes were closed and she was in deep meditation that was broken when she let out a primal scream of rage and then launched herself at an unseen figure and tackled them to the floor and began striking the unseen person so hard that her blood began to sully the pristine white of the room.

"She IS a wild one isn't she?" A voice said and pressed a hypospray to her neck which caused her to slump into a twitching ball on the floor.

"She broged muh nodes... ouf vit... teef... " the cloak suited guard said as he tried to get up.

"Well clearly you are not as silent as you think you are 'Silent Rip'" the other cloak suited figure said with a chuckle.

"Dats not muh cobe namb..." the other guard muttered and swung a missing blow with his hand.

"It suits you... all the efficacy of a silent fart." the man said and pulled off his hood. "Inform the medics we need some psionics... clearly there are two personalities in there. One calm and collected and one... insanely vicious and unhinged."

Meanwhile Julie was going on yet another tranquilizer induced 'vision quest' in her own mind or rather the fractured remnants of her mind.

"YOU SHOULD HAVE LET ME KILL HIM!" a woman that looked exactly like Julie screamed at the more calm looking Julie.

"You might have, who knows... they gave us enough thorazine to take down a nine foot Sehlat." Julie quipped and crossed her arms. "Why did you have to do that?"

"Because I want OUT OF HERE!" she screamed and raged. "Why are you letting them keep us here!? Don't you want to get out of here? Wear clothes at the very least?"

"After you nearly killed a man with my under wear and socks... choked two guards with our jumpsuit. Broke someone's skull with our shoes and embedded a water cup and plate into another." Julie told her more wild self. "If you would stop trying to kill everyone maybe we could get ourselves out of this FSS facility. Maybe we could actually figure out what happened to merge us into one body."

"You weren't complaining the other night..." the 'mirror' Julie teased. "I do still wonder, is it masturbation or lesbian if we had..."

"Will you shut up please... you're giving me a headache." Julie closed her eyes. "And we both were blisteringly drunk."

"Yeah right... clearly you weren't just sleeping with your Nicholas. I know from your own mind that he's 'fixed' with a shot during the war... so why were there four boxes of condoms in your drawer and enough pills hmmm?" the other Julie replied. "How many men HAVE you been with?"

"They're targets and I'm an agent... sometimes I have to." Julie bit her lower lip. "Look, he knows when I have to and we make up for it later."

"Uh huh. So that's why the FSS faked your death again... and he's probably going to shack up with either that doctor friend or his engineer friend. Or both, who knows. They're more mothers to his children than you are." The other Julie said and shrugged her shoulders. "What were you thinking anyway... I mean I had versions of those kids too, but only because their father wanted them and he raises them. I've always... WE'VE always been our own woman. We are far more alike than we're different. Even if we come from different worlds, we're the same. More the same than you want to admit."

"Then work with me alright?" Julie said with a sigh. "Let me drive more often... this IS my body... at least I think it is."

"Oh it's your's... I have way more muscle than you do. Elegance and grace is one thing, but having a bit of muscle behind that grace helps. I need to get you trained right." the other Julie said and chuckled. "Look, we're stuck here... may as well make the best of it."

[Anjali Sasyaki]

Anjali watched the monitors of Julie's cell and hummed.

"Perhaps this is not as bad as we think... this other Julie is an incredibly efficient weapon." Anjali said as she glanced at one of the other Directors.

"She's unhinged. You really think you can get her under control?" he inquired.

"If there is one thing I know is my daughter because no matter where this other version of her came from there was a version of me and in both realities... we created her. She either hates me or loves me. I know my daughter hates me but respects me." Anjali said and looked at her fingernails. "And if this one hates me too, she may respect me as well."

"You are a cold woman Anjali." he chuckled.

"I am an agent and I am a spy mistress. And we are in a war." Anjali said as she touched the screen. "I want to see her in person."

"Sure that's wise, she's got quite a bit of a body count." he said and shook his head.

"She won't kill me right away. I'm her mother." Anjali replied. "Besides, Julie knows better than to try anything. She is good, but I taught her everything she knows, but not everything I know."

"I knew you were going to say that." he rolled his eyes.

"Director... some things ARE true. Besides... we if there is one from this world this other one came from, there could be others and we need to know." Anjali reached into her pocket and pulled out a centuries old Section 31 communicator. "Remind me to tell you the story of my hero... Agent Phillipa Georgeou... in many ways she was a second mother to me. She was an Empress in another reality. Yet she served the Federation in this reality for a very long time. Until she met a protégé she saw herself in. But one thing she taught me... not to let sentiment get in the way. If Julie must be sanctioned, it will be at my hand. I brought her into this world, I will be the one to take her out of it. Not some random agent. Besides... I have another daughter that is shaping up to be a suitable successor to her sister. Once she's a little older."

[Noella St. James]

One Month Later --

Noella was sitting on Nick's porch to his house in Baraboo, WI. After Julie's funeral, he had decided to spend a bit more time on Earth with his twin daughters and young son. Despite the Dominion War still in its waning days, he was excused to take care of family business. Noella had her own... duplicate issues. In a transporter accident aboard her mother's ship the USS Cook-A she found herself split into two persons. Both with a little different side to her personality, she suspected it was related to her Siofran DNA and how her psionic and empathic abilities worked, she had always had some latent psychological issues with her personality, she could be deeply caring and focused and yet she struggled with a more diplomatic side that wanted to be more objective. Now... it seems that those duality issues are solved, the part of her that was an empathic, caring, focused and dedicated Doctor, remained as Nancy Peterson, MD. And the part of her that was diplomatic, objective and just a tiny bit obsessed with equity and fairness, was christened Noella St. James. A slight cosmetic alteration and some hair styling and she looked like a completely different woman, even felt different. Federation Corps of Diplomats even made her an acting Ambassador and Federation representative to any non member world that she would encounter during the war to try and smooth relations and get them compensation for any Starfleet military operations that take place on their soil.

But for now... she was here as Nick's friend, one of his oldest friends. Julie was barely in the ground a week and she was finding herself... oddly happy that she could finally act on the feelings she had toward Nick ever since they were in the Academy together. Part of her felt guilty for even thinking that way, Julie was a sort of friend... and mother to his three kids. And yet... she and Becca had always thought she was so totally wrong for him.

Finishing the last few drops of soda in the glass bottle she had in her hand, she added it to the growing collection of bottles on the front of the porch, Nick had been replicating all his drinks in glass bottles so he could use them for target practice. It was violent and a little silly but she supported him.

"Hey 'Ella..." Nick said as he walked backward out of the house with a tray of sandwiches, using his back to push the door open. "Can you grab the napkins before they fall out of my pocket?"

"Sure..." Noella said and chuckled. "I could have helped you with that you know."

"I know, that's why I didn't want you helping... you've already done more than I could have asked these past couple of weeks. Angel seems to like the outfits you got her." Nick said as he put the tray on the table on the porch. "Marcus won't put down that little motorcyle toy."

"I'm glad they like it. What about Olivia? Does she like her clothes?" Noella inquired.

"Girl's an islander at heart, I worry she's going to be a nudist when she gets older." Nick shook his head. "She wore the shoes but still practically lives in her swimsuit and sarong."

"That's funny... yeah... I see that." Noella said and sat down. "It's peaceful out here."

"Yeah always wanted to spend more time here, Circus museum is about four blocks away, the downtown area always puts on a huge parade in the summer. First time I've worked it since I was a kid with my dad and my uncles." Nick said and sighed happily. "When this place came up I couldn't pass it up. Just needed a little... normal. After Julie... the war... the demotions and promotions... the weird missions... I need to get my head back on straight."

"First smart thing you did was let me come to help." Noella said with a smile. "Becca and Natalia are busy with getting the Erebus built. My 'sister' will be her CMO."

"I can see that." Nick nodded his head and cut his sandwich in half. "And what about you... where are you going to be posted?"

"No bloody clue mate... but I have plenty of leave that I never took as Nancy and she's too focused on her medical duties to take it, so I may as well." Noella said as she raised her glass of sangria. "Lovely sangria by the way." she said before taking another sip.

"Had to balance out those three Cokes you just had." Nick chuckled and closed his eyes. "I do appreciate everything Noella... really."

"I also appreciate how naturally you say my new name." She said with an amused smile as she picked up a sandwich.

"Kinda suits you... course, that is partially my middle name." Nick said with a suspicious hum to his voice. "That wouldn't be... on purpose would it?"

"A lady never tells and a gentlemen shouldn't ask." Noella teased and crossed her legs and leaned forward. "Besides... you weren't this blonde before... that wouldn't be... on purpose would it?" she gave him a similar hum.

"Fair enough." Nick nodded his head and took a bite and swallowed. "So... what do you say to having something a bit more fancy than this tonight? My Aunt Donna is going to be around to take the kids to a museum and then a sleep over, so y'know... we have the evening to ourselves."

"Mister Ryder.. are you asking me out on a date?" Noella said with a look of mock shock, in reality she was happy he FINALLY was asking.

"Maybe. You accepting?" Nick raised an eyebrow.

"It's a date. Just... wear something other than jeans okay? I may be a simple girl, but you haven't changed out of those in a week and they smell like gas and charcoal."

"How would you know?" Nick teased her. "Unless you've been sniffing my clothes..."

"Please... you leave a vapor trail a blind man can follow." Noella poked his arm. "And shower."

"Yes ma'am. Gee... fancy fancy..."

"You did say fancier than this." Noella pointed to the sub sandwiches.

"That I did. Fancy it is." Nick said with a smile.

Later that Night --

Noella was a 'good girl'... so why was she in one of Nick's t-shirts... sleeping next to the man? She didn't regret it but at three in the morning it kind of hit her what they had just done in the heat of the moment and heat was an understatement, it took every ounce of her psionic concentration to keep his flame at bay while they...

"You're thinking too loud." Nick muttered into the pillow. "And I'm very hungover..."

"Oh... I didn't... I... maybe I..." Noella stammered

"Don't... just... stay and don't think so loud." Nick said and looked at her. "We're grown adults... and this was a long time in coming... unlike you."

"OH!" Noella playfully swatted at him. "You don't play fair... I wasn't able to help myself..."

"Mhm... well... it was better than I expected... maybe you and Becca were right after all. Which means I owe her a truck." Nick said as he put the pillow over his head. "After I get past this headache... never having blackberry brandy straight again..."

"Weak Yank." Noella teased.

"Aussie lush." Nick teased back.

"Lady of the Iron Liver." Noella said proudly.

[Rebecca Talon]

- That morning.

The sun was just peaking over the tops of the trees. The streets were still wet from an early morning shower, and the air was fresh.

Rebecca was wearing her black Stetson cowboy hat, t-shirt, jeans and a pair of brown cowboy boots. Climbing the steps up the porch the rang the doorbell.

[Nick Ryder]

Nick opened the door in a pair of shorts and a t-shirt and gave her a half squinty eyed look. "I swear if you're asking me to go for a ride with you... I'm closing this door right now." he chuckled and winced. "Sorry, blackberry brandy hangover. Worse than Romulan Ale. Romulan Ale I can process... " he gestured for her to come in. Then he realized that Noella was sitting at the breakfast nook in one of his shirts. "Shit..."

"Hey Becca." Noella smiled weakly and waved. "Uhm... now I'm suddenly feeling very under dressed..." she got up and scooted upstairs.

"Okay... it is what look like. Kinda one thing after another and the brandy and... I'm still processing it." Nick said and walked into the kitchen and poured two very large mugs of coffee and then a smaller one. Taking all three mugs he walked over and handed the smaller one to Becca. "These two are mine." he sat down and in two gulps finished one mug and put it aside and cradled the other in his hands.

[Rebecca Talon]

She nodded a thanks and took a sip before sitting across from Nick. "You know that hurts that you feel like you should be embarrassed. It's your life, and none of my business, and if this is how you plan to grieve... then who am I to say?"

[Nick Ryder]

"Well Nan... Noella are your best friends... I mean... " Nick sighed heavily. "And she's been there for the girls and Marcus and they're going to need a mother figure. I am not at all prepared to be a single father. Still other than Julie... you and Noella are the only two other women I've known most of my adult life and know me well enough not to run screaming." he glanced toward the bedroom. "Felt right, felt wrong, felt right again... I dunno what to think anymore. I don't regret it but then again Noella is almost a fresh slate... and she's actually survived here for a while without wanting to murder me in my sleep."

"TODAY!" Noella shouted. "I wanted to bloody massacre you the day before. Mr. Leaves the Seat up!"

[Noella St. James]

Noella had quickly changed clothes and chuckled as she sat on the edge of Nick's chair. "But then I went back to lovin' ya... so it evens out." she sighed and shook her head. "I don't regret it either... but it's just... like he said... weird. Can't say I haven't sort of... fantasized about it and you've told me countless times that I should find someone... that I need to get laid. Well... "

"Please tell me that wasn't your first time..." Nick winced.

"Wouldn't you like to know... but no... don't flatter yourself... less said about my first time the better. Annnnyway... " Noella stretched and got up from the arm of Nick's chair. "So what brings you around Becca?"

[Rebecca Talon]

Rebecca hesitated. To just say she was checking on him due to recent events didn't seem tactful. She smiled and hid her embarrassment behind her cup. "I thought I'd come to Earth on my days off and visit dad. And since I was here, I thought I'd drop by."

[Noella St. James]

"That was nice of you... although I'm pretty sure not the only reason." Noella replied and looked at her with a raised eyebrow. "We've known each other for years... although I suppose you haven't really known this version of me that long. I guess it's a good thing we're both in a weird place with our careers." she sighed. "Starfleet Intel wants him to work with them, both as a designer and a field operative. I think they're batshit crazy... spy life took his wife for pity's sake."